Farewell, Summer...Thou Hast Been Cruely Ripped From Me By The Evil School Year.

Welllll, that was a bit dramatic.

Yesterday was my last first day of high school, thus ending my last summer while I'm in high school.

I feel like I'm nearing a cliff, unable to see what's below. But my pace is becoming so rapid that I can't stop...and even if I could, the speed and the mystery and the excitement is exhilarating, despite the occasional explosion of butterflies caused by a bump in the road. I'm so close to this end, and yet so far...and when I reach it, what next? Will I fall, or will I fly? Will I want to go see what's below or take to the sky?

Anyway. Before I get carried away with thoughts of the end of this year, here's a bit about this past summer.

I grew in my relationship with Jesus. He continues to fill me with wonder and draw me into a beautiful, passionate relationship with Him. It's really hard to be a Christian today and not get discouraged by the world and despair, but choosing to live in His hope and His love is always worth it. I also grew in my relationship with His mom, Mary. I know that a lot of other Christians believe that Catholics worship Mary, but we don't. Jesus entrusted her to His apostle John (and in doing so, to us) and entrusted St. John (and us) to Mary when He was dying on the cross. Mary leads me closer to Jesus...kind of like how if I want my dad to do something, I'll ask my mom first so that she can help petition him. Anyway, this summer I consecrated myself to Mary. Basically, I went through a retreat sort of thing in order to entrust myself into her care. It was really awesome and definitely helped my spirituality.

I met amazing men of Christ. At summer camp, I was awed by the incredible guys I met that are so desperately in love with Jesus it brought tears to my eyes. They really strengthened my resolve to keep my expectations high and hold men accountable. Also, they helped me to trust God that He has someone for me who will lead me closer to Him.

I met amazing women of Christ. Also at summer camp...they inspired me to trust more in Jesus and abandon myself completely to Him. They inspired me to let only Him define me. They showed me that it's not a one time thing, but an every day process and decision that's difficult but so, so worth it.

I lost a friend over my beliefs. That hurt. Unfortunately, though, it's life. We are called to share our beliefs with love. Sometimes, even when we're loving, hate is the response that we get. I struggle at times to still be loving even after that...but God always provides the grace necessary to fulfill everything He asks of us.

I set aside my fear and confronted someone who needed to be confronted. This was really tough. Like up all night before and sick to my stomach tough. But again, God always provides the grace necessary to fulfill everything He asks of us, and I truly believed that He wanted me to do this...so even in my fear, I talked to someone who had really hurt me. It didn't solve everything and things didn't necessarily get better, but I walked away from the meeting with a new found peace and closure.

I realized that a lot of people are fake. As negative as that may sound, I feel like it's a reality that everyone has to experience and discover in life. I also realized that I can't be the only person in a relationship to be making effort.

I unexpectedly gained a new best friend. A family friend came and lived with us this summer to do some interning for our nonprofit...despite living down the street from me when I lived in PA, Anna and I were never really close. However, this summer, we shared so much...from shopping and ice-cream and making dinner together, to deep late night talks featuring lots of laughing and tears. It was seriously incredible, I'm so blessed by her and miss her so much!

I spent lots of time with my cousin. If you've been following my blog for any amount of time, you know that I'm super close with my cousin, Alex. We spent every day together in the summer when I lived in PA, so living four hours away from her is really difficult. Anyway, I was so blessed to be able to spend collectively about three weeks with her. We did a lot of fun stuff: put putting, shopping, swimming, typical girly summer stuff that was 100x better because it was with her.

I did a lot for Mass Impact, the ministry my family runs. I worked the table at our local Christian music festival and got to talk to a lot of amazing people. We also had a pretty big festival that we put a loooooot of work into. That took up most of the summer...but it was cool to serve so many families and help them grow closer to each other and to Jesus!

I'm feeling increasingly validated to do NET. I've talked about NET before, but for new readers-- NET (National Evangelization Team) is a ministry that trains and sends teams of young adults all over the country to do retreats for high school and middle school students. I'm in the process of applying for next year (2015-2016). I've definitely had some doubts as to whether this is what God really wants me to do...it's hard to give up a year of my life! Especially since I'm excited to go to college. This summer, though, God made it increasingly clear through other people's support and different events that that is where He wants me to be.

So there you have it, folks. It was an insane summer, and I'm looking forward to this school year God taught me so much this summer and blessed me in so many ways...cannot wait to see where He takes me this year.

How was your summer?

IS THIS THING ON?!?!

I think I nearly forgot how to blog. It's funny, before the A-Z Challenge, me blogging two weeks apart would have been GOALS, but now it feels so WEIRD.

How dare I leave you for a week longer than I promised! Did you survive?! I do hope so.

Camp was amazing. So, so, so incredible. I met some of the most incredible people and really grew in my relationship with Jesus, which was awesome. But more on that later.

The amount of selfies that happened
was ridiculous.

The reason for my prolonged absence was because my cousins were in town. I kept telling myself that I was going to blog, but it was so hard to break away. I grew up with these cousins (we lived in the same town until I was fourteen) and we're all super close. Especially Alex and myself...she knows me better than anyone, and defines the term "best friend" for me. Anyway, so we were super busy this past week and gone doing crazy things (pool, museum, put-put, the works). But more on that later.

Us being weird. So basically us
being us.

Unfortunately, the insanity is not about to die down. I'm taking an impromptu trip to visit Alex and family (GOING BACK TO MY HOMETOWN YAY!!) with my youngest brother tomorrow. But I have some things lined up for next week, so hopefully I'll still be able to at least blog, if not visit other blogs. But more on that later.

Speaking of which, I've missed reading everyone's blogs so much!! I can't wait to see what y'all have been up to.

Also...I decided to do Camp Nano! Life is already insane enough, might as well add some crazy. I'll be working TBN (which I talked about in my summer goals post). I'm still going to be doing my best to blog two to three times a week though, don't you worry.

LASTLY...a huge round of thanks goes to Rachel Pattinson for nominating me for the Infinity Blog Award! She's a doll, guys, seriously.

I'm supposed to give eleven facts about myself, so here we go. Brace yourselves.

1. I had a make-believe best friend named Katelyn.
2. I had a make-believe villain named Michael Alvin who lived on my top bunk until I moved to the top bunk and then he moved to my closet. He could make himself super tiny during the day and then at night he would come to his full size. He was friends with all of the Disney villains and his sole purpose in life was to marry me. 
3. I used to force my brothers to go on "Michael Alvin" hunts during the day and sometimes I would try to rub the skin off of their faces to see if they were actually Michael Alvin wearing a mask.
4. I had a crush on Ty Pennington (from ABC's Extreme Makeover: Home Addition) for like...five years. Or so. (OH MY GOSH, I found out that his name is actually Gary a few weeks ago...like WHAT EVEN my childhood is ruined.)
5. I've been to a different school for each year of high school so far. Thankfully, I'm staying homeschooled for my senior year.
6. I was the Artful Dodger in the musical Oliver my sophomore year.
7. My neighbors, cousins, siblings, and I put on Annie the musical in my backyard about seven summers ago. I was Annie (of course, because I always had to be the center of attention). It was terrible. We have a video of it, and let's just say, y'all should be glad that my sass has gotten somewhat under control since then.
8. The first year I did NaNoWriMo, my brother Joseph made an account and pretended to be a guy my age and we messaged for a long time before I discovered that it was actually Joseph. I was so, so, so mad. SO MAD.
9. I HATE Skittles. With a passion.
10. I'm discerning doing a year of missionary work before college. (Prayers appreciated!)
11. I dress up literally every day. The worst part of camp was that I could not bring my maxi skirts or my wedges. Not about that athletic shorts life.

Now for Rachel's questions:

1. If you could be any superhero, who would it be and why?

Black Widow! Because she's kick butt but still feminine and able to depend on others as well as still care about them a lot.
2. If you had to choose between permanently too hot or too cold, which one would you choose?

Too hot! I love love love heat and am still recovering from winter. Actually, I am not really sure that there is such a thing as too hot.
3. What's your ultimate writing dream?

Oh man...honestly, I don't have one. I mean, I have goals, but they're just kind of...there. I'm trying to figure out how God wants me to use my writing in life. Right now, I'm just writing for Him and me, and it's going really well. I guess I would have to say that I'd love to be published. Or have an agent represent me. One of the two would be pretty sweet, but I'm also content where I'm at right now. 

Now...for the eleven bloggers that I'm nominating! 

1. Ashley
2. Jessica Wolf
3. Opal
4. Nicole S.
5. Jack
6. Abigail Post
7. Candice Williams
8. Rcubed
9. Katie Grace
10. Emily Ann Putzke
11. Jo

(No pressure to do this, guys, seriously...but just want you to know how much I love you and how awesome your blogs are!)

My questions:

1. Would you rather be a butterfly or a bumble bee?
2. Post a paragraph or a stanza of your latest writing project. (I guess that wasn't really a question...will you please post a paragraph or stanza?)
3. What are your blogging goals for the rest of the year?

Okay, now I'm off to go read up on all of your blogs. It's good to be back.

A Reason Why I Write: The Beauty Of A Friend

Ah, I should get the worst blogger of the year award for how much I neglect this baby. *Sigh* Honestly, I think about it so much and all the magnificent posts I have planned, but, alas, these ideas never seem to leave my head.

But this one idea has been pounding inside my brain, begging to be exhaled onto a piece of paper.

I have had an insane start to the year. I brought the New Year in with my bestest friend and cousin, toasting to turning fourteen (her) and turning sixteen (me) and being grown up and evil schemes and writing books and starting high school (her) and only having two years left (me) and all sorts of nonsense. Then we preceeded to stay up until-- er, let's just leave it at very late (or, um, early), as my mother reads this blog.

Additionally, I was fortunate to be able to stand for life in Washington, D.C. this January with some of my favorite people in the world from local youth groups. I was blest to go to a Matt Maher concert, who I have postively adored since I was, like, six. He led Eucharistic Adoration (as Catholics, we honor the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus Christ present during this sacrament) one night and it was seriously one of the most beautiful things I've ever expirienced.

Another absolutely amazing event that took place was my aunt's wedding on February 1st. . .that was incredible. It was an added bonus that I was able to go home to Erie for the wedding! And that I got to hang out with my crazy cousin =)

Oh, and I've had close to fifteen snow days. Which has been incredible because I've accomplished a ton in regaurds to my WIP. But it's absolutely unheard of, from where I've come from. Even one snow day is absolutely unacceptable, though there is easily enough snow in Erie, Pennsylvannia to warrant it, thank you very much.

Fortunately (or unfortunately), though 2014 has been crazy so far, I have had plenty of time to think. And about fifty-percent of the time, when I'm thinking, I'm thinking about Erie. I'm thinking about things I've said and done, about people I've loved and people I've hated-- ahem, disliked. I've thought about things I've written and what made me write them. I've also been thinking about the reasons why I write, as I've been finding it harder and harder to just Sit Down And Write.

And then, through my rememberings and thinkings, BAM, it hit me. Figuratively, of course.

Let me tell you a story.

Once upon a time (ahem, like sevenish years ago), there was a young, impressonable, aspiring writer. . .who still is that way. Anyhow, so I was friends with this other girl who I shared much in common with. Same beliefs, same school (or homeschool program, rather), same grade, and similar interests. Yes, she was a writer too. And our parents were basically best friends, so that's always helpful when two girls are knieveing to hang out.

We didn't see each other as much as we wanted to (maybe once, twice, three times a month), due to a variety of reasons, but everytime we hung out it was like the best day of my life. Not neccessarily when other girls were involved-- you know those friends that are just better one on one? That was us. But when we did hang out, just us, my entire body hurt from smiling and laughing my head off.

And of course, the best part of our friendship was the writing aspect. I can still see her in my mind, sitting on the queen-size bed in our old guest room as I explained to her the latest developement in my plot. I remember laying on her bedroom floor, pouring over her latest draft. She was the Best Writer Ever to me and I was always secretly jealous of how well she could string words together. And her plots were fantastic. After I read parts of her story, I would be in a daze for many hours to come.

My absolute favorite memory with her, though, is the day that I told her I liked to write. Maybe it wasn't that day that I told her, actually, but it was the first day that she had read anything I had every written. She was so impressed (probably much more then the piece deserved) and INSISTED that I read it to her family.

The second best part of going to her house (the first being her, of course) was her family. I don't remember ever being that included and welcomed and loved in a family that I wasn't even related to. I remember sitting at her kitchen table, just talking to her parents.

Anyway, so after dinner, her whole family gathered in their living room (there were at least four kids, at this point-- they now have six, just like us), and I read my story. Not the whole thing (the whole thing never actually ended up being written), it was just a chapter or two. But I finished and they clapped and hugged me and told me what a good writer I was and clapped and hugged some more.

If I live to publish a million books and am on every TV and radio talk show in the world, those events will never come close to that moment, in her dimly lit living room, with her family squished together on the couch, listening intently as I read about Beth Kingston, a 12-year-old who gets transported back to Camelot.

Unfortunately, life has come between me and my first real writing friend. We went to the same high school and ended up in different social circles and didn't talk very much. Life has a way of twisting people and friendships so that they are completely unrecognizable from when we first met, from when we first began. But I greatly regret letting such a valuable friendship slip away so easily.

So, this is a reason why I write. She is.

She was the first person (outside of my family) to tell me I could write. To be interested in where my story was going. To tell me to never give up, to never stop writing. She made me feel special, like I had so much potential. She encouraged me to push on, even on hard days. She told me not to let life get in the way of writing.

My eyes are full of tears as I type this. Some people are just so beautiful, you know? Those little moments spent with some people are what make a life a life, what make it all worthwhile. So I suppose this post is begging to be ended with one of the most common of sentiments: remember the little moments. Don't be lost in the past, but don't be so fixated on the future that you forget to look in the rear-veiw mirror once in a while.

And, though we often find ourselves moving on and being moved on from, let us remember the wise words of L.M. Montgomery, delievered from Anne Shirley: "True friends will always remain together in spirit."

ONE YEAR!!!

August marked the one year birthday of my blog. 

*EXCITED SQUEAL!*
 

Ahem. Where has the time gone?!

It has been a life changing year full of blessings, beauty, and surprises. It's been insane. In a good way. Well, mostly good, at least.

It has been a very, very crazy ride. And I owe lots of people lots of thanks.

Number One Thanks: JESUS! Because You rock my world. Thank You for holding me always, through both peace and turmoil.

Number Two: My parents! Thank you, Dad, for encouraging me to do things out of my comfort zone. Thank you for pushing me to greatness. Mom, thank you for always being there for me to cry or laugh or whatever with. Thank you for choosing to give me life. Thank you for your love and support.

Number Three: My absolutely beautiful, amazing cousin, Alex. You are wise beyond your years, girlfriend. Thank you for every time you've held me when I've cried and listened to me blubber over the phone. Thank you for laughing with me and staying up until. . .well, let's just say, very late. . .to listen and talk to me. Thank you for all the help you did in creating this blog--it seriously wouldn't have been posible without you. You're doing great things, love, and you are going to do so many more. To infinity and beyond!

Number Four: A very special thanks goes to Jen Wagner (http://writtenenvogue.wordpress.com/). Jen, you are so talented in absolutely everything you do. I'm so, so blest that you are a part of my life. Thank you for telling me which books to read and which books not to. Thanks for telling me to start the blog in the first place. Thank you for always being there for me to rant to and for being excited with me about every little writing milestone. I can't wait to put your book on my shelf someday!

Number Five: Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU, to Faith Hough (http://faithehough.blogspot.com/

 )! Faith, I have looked up to you since day one. Thank you for your critiques of my writing. I value your opinion so very much. Thank you for reading what I write and for letting me peek into the mind of a creative genius. You seriously inspire me to no end. Every time I see your name pop up in my inbox, it makes me smile. Thank you=)

Number Six: Jeannette Smejkal (www.folioroad.com), you are ULTRA-AMAZING. Thank you for being the first to read my WIP and being honest with me about every single aspect of it. I've been so blest to work with you. You are a huge inspiration to me. I cannot believe how crazy talented you are. Thank you for keeping me writing.

Number Seven: Linda Kemper, who is probably the most giving person ever. Kempy, thank you for reading all my blog posts and always asking about my writing. Thank you for always being there for me. Words cannot express how grateful I am for you.

Number Eight: YOU! I have interacted with some of the most amazing readers/writers/whatever-ers on the planet. I have been so blest by each and every one of you guys. I have learned so much from all the blog posts I've read by you and the comments you've posted. I'm just so in awe of you all.

I'm so very blest to be on this writing journey with all of you guys. I love love love y'all!!!

Here's to another year of reading and writing!